I Need To Start Doing These More Often....

So I have tons to write about but not so much space or people's attention to do it....mini recap of the past 2 or so weeks....Jayden in 1 day started riding her bike and lost her 2nd tooth! That was a HUGE day for her and she at that point became the greatest bike rider to ever ride a bike. Her riding in a straight line or turning and coming back turned into her telling me and others about the cool tricks she did and in her eyes she was AWESOME! That is really all that matters.



Jayden also went to her very first "formal" tea party for Valentine's Day last Saturday. The girls didn't dress up in their fanciest but each one had on valentines clothes and they drank out of real tea cups and had sandwiches, it was so cute!! She had a blast!!

 

As easy as it is to talk about Jayden all the time, (because I do it all the time), I made a decision last week, one that I made before but I didn't stick to well so I made another one. I started counting calories and watching what I eat and I am going to lose my weight. I am going to lose my weight from having Jayden....not just lose it and find it again but lose it and kick it to the curb. I am going to throw that weight away!! I did this after Pa died and I did great, I was down 40 lbs and then I stopped, I stopped watching as much what I ate in the sense of being cautious and more or less started watching it go into my mouth and then watched it grow on certain body parts to the point that I can't take it anymore. I am ok with never being a size 2, or 4, or even a 10 but I just wanted to be healthy. I just want to feel pretty again, I want to be able to jump with Jayden on her trampolene and to be a mom that she will be proud of. I want to be proud of myself and right now all I can see is a mom who has let herself go, more than once....one who doesn't wear make up or fix herself up anymore. One who eats whatever she wants, whenever she wants, and exercise...what is that? I haven't done any exercise in so long my body hates me for even thinking about it. So I started my profile on my fitness pal and I started counting my calories and I weighed myself the first day and away I went. I am now a week and 1 day in and I have cheated a little here and there but I have lost 7.5lbs. I weigh 7.5lbs less than I weighed last week, I still had dinner out with my family this weekend and I am surviving. I will make it this time, it make take some time (I believe that your life shouldn't stop because you are on a diet or watching what you are eating, and last night I had a cheeseburger and fries....well half of one) but I will make it and reach my goal. I don't have a weight goal....I have a healthy goal. I would love to be what I was in high school or even smaller, but what I want more than anything is to feel good again. To be happy when I look in the mirror and to be healthy.